Taken Out Of Your Character…

Taken Out Of Your Character…
I hate to allow people to take me out of my character because you allow them to have control over you that only you should have. Today, I had to deal with this very situation and at this moment I feel horrible because I know my wrongdoings, but was aware of her wrongdoings, as well. This woman threatened me for no reason because I was backing out of the gas station, under supervision of her husband with her car parked behind me in a inconvenient way. This woman chose to park behind me when another car was in front of me waiting for the pump. It was really uncaused for, I couldn’t believe that I was in this confrontation that I wasn’t really trying to be in. I didnt want to call this woman out of her name, because one, this woman was my elder and two I didnt want to go there with her. However, I was feeling conflicted because I really wanted to get out of my car and punch her ass but I knew all of this was wrong to begin with. Now, I have this really bad conscience because of my actions or lack thereof. The moral of the story, I should have not allowed her to take me out of character and I now know that I will not act on every word said to me because the stress is not worth it for me. I know that I am not one for drama and I can’t allow people to rouse me up, I have a weakness for allowing people to get to me in the worse way. Damn, my mind is clouded by this situation because of what could have taken place, I just chose to drive away and avoid the fight but I still argued with this ignorant woman. Learning to never allow myself to get out of character, picking and choosing my battles…That is what makes me a Grown Woman…

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Sometimes You Just Need Rest

Feelings of weariness doesn’t necessarily mean only your body feels tired, it could be that your mind and heart could be tired. There are so many things going on around and amongst us that it can take an emotional, spiritual, mental and physical toll on us. When this occurs we just need rest, we need to rest our mind and body too. However, sometimes resting your mind, benefits you more because we think resting our body is enough but the mind continues to be preoccupied with unwanted thoughts. How can you rest when the mind is on overload, thoughts continually racing and hour after hour is passing you by? Sometimes your mind needs rest and needs a moment of silence to just process life for what it is. Your mind can become so preoccupied with thoughts that you have wasted a whole night of sleep, finally waking up after an hr or two of sleep, feeling tired than when you layed down. There has been many of days when I was away at school and I just layed in my bed, staring at the ceiling with a million and one thoughts hitting me from every angle. My mind was weary, I needed rest physically, ┬ámentally and spiritually but I was restless and super agitated I missed out on much needed rest. It is important to not allow these thoughts to consume you, you have to try and ease your mind the best way you know how. Pray, meditate, write, hell a glass of wine always works but seriously your body is not the only thing that gets tired and can shut down. The mind is a powerful thing that can make or break you, but the end result is up to you…

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To Know Not What Love Is…

What do you do when you know not what Love Is ? What you have known for many years does not feel right but feels familiar to the point you are blinded to what Love Is. Your afraid to feel Love, so you try to avoid it at all cost. Anytime you feel loved, you find away to mess it up, so that you don’t have to experience it. Your mind can’t accept that you should be loved, so you tell yourself this can’t be true, you convince yourself that something is wrong, this can’t be right. For so long you experienced what love is not, til you KNOW NOT WHAT LOVE IS…

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